I am getting a little hacked off with seeing comments from supposed Angel Mums on certain support sites making stupid remarks about how the loss of someone who's baby died in pregnancy is less of that of someone who's baby lived and then died.
At least those who think their loss is 'greater' than mine were lucky enough to have seen the colour of their babies eyes and will never forget the sound of their baby's cries. My 'lucky' self; I have just two pictures of my Son, 45 minutes of holding his cold still body and a lifetime of wondering would he have liked this, would he have acted like that etc etc it goes on forever. I know which I would prefer.
Yes both situations are different but no way does it mean that one is greater then the other. Since when did losing your child become a competition over who is more hurt?! If this is a game then I would like a full refund please because this isn't what I originally signed up for.
A loss of a child is a loss of a child, in pregnancy and after.
Whatever happened to supporting those who walk in the same shoes as you...
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Ooo if I read whatever you had I'd probably be fuming a bit. One thing I try to keep in mind when hearing about other people losses is that death SUCKS. No matter who, what, when- it's just terrible. And the loss of a child, no matter the age or the time is devastating. There is no room for competition in grief, at least there shouldn't be. I gave you a blogger award, I very much enjoy reading your blog.
ReplyDeleteExactly. It should never be a competion. How can anyone compare the loss of their child to someone elses loss?
ReplyDeleteOh thank you very much! *blushes*
:( I am so sorry for the loss of your baby. I honestly don't understand why people feel the need to compare losses. Sometimes I can't believe things I've heard people say in regards to loss that other people suffer.
ReplyDeleteWe never know what goes on in the heart of another of how grief affects someone. I believe it is never our place to assume either. Anyway I hear you. I just want to let you know I agree that to compare grief is ridiculous and must be a painful thing to endure.
I am so terribly sorry again about your baby.