Behind This Blog

‘riding the waves of time’ originally began its life as a simple pregnancy diary titled 'bob in the oven', with the odd post here and there written to the little human growing within my expanding belly. The first ever post of this blog can be read here and my last pregnancy post written two days before Bobbys death can be read here.

The original and rather naive idea was to document our first, two year long waited pregnancy which would then be printed out, stored away and brought out at a later date for that grown baby to read.

However as with most things in life, that idea went out of the window when, on the 3rd July 2009 at 5:48am our world changed forever when our Son was born sleeping due to a prolapse of the umbilical cord which was brought on by PROM and a Low Lying Placenta.

This blog has since taken on a life of its own.

It is now a place to retreat to when I am need of a rant or a few blah blah blah.

It’s my place to type out my grief.

Where I am free to remove it from my head, out through my fingers and onto the screen. It is the place where I try to understand what has happened, why it has happened and most of all; what to do next and how best to do it.

It is where I come to talk to my little man when talking to him in my head will no longer suffice.

It has become my grown up ‘angel mummy’ comfort blanket.

This blog holds within it the joy of pregnancy, the not-so-silent ‘birth’ of a sleeping baby, the tremendous guilt of loss, the sadness of grief, the stupidity of strangers to the surprising moments from friends. The wonderment of self discovery, the pain of depression and the ever so confusing roller coaster journey for our Rainbow baby which is now back underway. As well as a few posts about the 'normal life stuff' thrown in here and there.